jan 5

so i guess it has been quite a while since i've used this blog, but i figure better late than never :) well things have been moving pretty fast but going nowhere the past six months or so. i am still hanging around in nc and working both jobs. i'm enjoying my time here, but honestly didn't think this is where i would be at this point in my life. i know that God has an amazing plan and i just need to sit back and enjoy the ride until he reveals that plan. i have definitely already learned some lesson during this time so i thought i would share a few of them. 1. i've learned to stop focusing on the blessings that i feel that i am missing out on, and open my eyes to the numerous blessings God has given me. i feel like in the american society we are always looking for what we don't have instead of enjoying what we do. God tells us that he cares for us, provides for us, and knows the plans he has for us. the only thing we truly need is Christ and guess what, that's already been given to us through his birth, death, and resurrection and the rest is just icing on the cake. 2. i've also learned to just enjoy where i am right now and see how God is using me now. i have always been a planner and always looked forward to the next step. i often feel like where i am now God can't use me, but one day he will. well this is so not true. God uses me every day and it is my responsibility to focus on the present. i am trying to see where he wants to use me where i am now and be intentional with my time and relationships! this isn't always easy because most days i am just counting down the minutes until 8pm, but i am trying to be more proactive in my daily life. during the new year i had the privilege of chaperoning a youth trip and one night every song that the band played was like words written specifically from God to me. after the worship time i wrote out a letter to God using several of the song lyrics and felt that i needed to share it, so i will close out my post with this. i pray that each person reading this take these words to heart and put God first in his or her life because honestly nothing else of this world matters if you don't have Him!!! God, i want to desire you, not simply love you, but truly desire you. to know that there is nothing greater than you, so why do i desire these other things in my life when you are the greatest of all things. you are the perfect creator and you are my friend. you made every single thing, yet you choose to desire me, love me, have a relationship with me, and be a friend to me. i don't have to earn this or do something to get this love, i simply must fall on my knees and cry out to you for you to be my friend and my Savior. your love never gives up, it's unfailing and unending no matter what. i want to run to your arms and feel your embrace for the rest of my days and on into eternity. my heart will speak no other name, but the name of Jesus. This doesn't mean that these other desires will disappear, but i know that all i need is your love. i am sufficient with only Christ and i will cry out his great, wonderful, beautiful name first and forevermore.